For weeks leading up to the photo shoot, I read blog after blog about others boudoir photo experiences. I perused picture after picture for make-up, hair, and outfit ideas. I looked at every angle of every picture to determine the poses I thought would flatter my figure the most. I even practiced my ‘looks’ in the mirror.
We booked the best photographer we know, Tara Jeles of http://www.sojelesphotography.com/, booked a beautiful hotel room in a new London hotel http://www.metrohotels.ca/ , and recruited 3 other lovely women to join us for this amazing experience.
It became so much more than just acquiring a few good pictures.
We shopped for weeks for the perfect outfits-planned our hair and make-up-and dreamed of what we could be for a day. We decided to make the weekend more than just a photo shoot. Annette and I headed to London on Friday afternoon to meet with Debs and Chandra for a little pampering. We enjoyed a bottle of red wine while being manicured and pedicured, all with the anticipation of the yummy Take-Out Thai food that would follow. We spent a couple of hours admiring each others outfit choices, but mostly the shoes. And made last minute decisions on wardrobe changes and photo options. We all went to bed early to get our much needed beauty rest and to be ready for our 5am start. Oof.
We all met at the hotel early on Saturday morning for a day we will never forget. Chandra was in charge of our amazing make-up. Mandy was in charge of our hair. And Tara was in charge of capturing us at our best. They were all a part of making us our most beautiful. There was a lot of nervous anticipation. We were all about to get nearly naked in a room full of women whom all have the body we want. Or don’t want. And that’s when it all changed…for me.
I suddenly became unnaturally comfortable with myself. It was something I had never really experienced. I am always hard on myself for being too fat. I have always wanted to be a ‘skinny’ person, but have never been able to stick to a healthy eating plan long enough to get there. I was in a room full of women whom were so much more ‘perfect’ than me. Longer legs, flatter tummies, firmer breasts, nicer hair, and smoother skin. I am always so wrapped up in what I ‘want’ to be that I never stop to think about what I have that is great. It never occurs to me that I have something more ‘perfect’ than someone else. But on this day it happened. I was complimented on my curves and my smile and my pretty eyes. And even though I have heard those things before, this time it was different. I realized that I am not alone. I realized that every woman in the world has issues with her body that are unjustified. One friend was worried she would look too boney; one was worried about flabby legs and one about her odd shaped breasts. All the while the rest of us are thinking ‘they’re crazy-they are all so beautiful’. WE are all so beautiful. I embraced my curves for the first time and I smiled to my little hearts content.
Waiting for the album to arrive was nerve racking as hell. Sure I became comfortable having the photos taken, but how was I really going to feel when I saw them. Turns out, I felt okay. I was pleasantly surprised with the outcome. Sure I see things I don’t want to see and there are things that I wish were different, but Tara listened to my concerns and focused on the areas that I felt were my assets.
I couldn’t wait for Brian to see them. He liked them too. But the best part of his reaction was that he was proud of me. He praised me for having the confidence to go through with it and was so pleased that I was actually happy with the photos of myself. For once.
